Title:  snore, sniff, and sneeze

Composer:  Tom Lehrer

Lead vocals:  Tom Lehrer

Backing vocals:  none

Scene:  Cartoon with a fox singing about some of his favorite things.

[TL]  Like a rooster loves a hen,

Like a lion loves his den,

Like Barbie loves Ken,

I love to do things that begin with “sn”.

I love to sneeze.

Pardon me, please.

I like to sniffle.  It really feels nice.

One handkerchief’ll just never suffice.

But brother, watch out for the breeze

When I sneeze.

I love to sniff.

Just take a whiff.

I also like snarling.  It feels good to me.

Snarling is darling.  I’m sure you’ll agree.

But I’m even happier if

I can sniff.

And sneeze.

I love to snore.

It’s more like a roar!

I like to snooze.  I like resting my head.

I take off my shoes, and I snuggle in bed.

Sometimes I just lie on the floor,

And snore.

And sniff.

And sneeze.

Sometimes I just like to snicker.  Tee-hee!

Or snub any snob who is snotty to me.

And whenever I have a few moments to spend,

I can snoop on a neighbor, or snitch on a friend.

But much more than any of these,

I love to snore and to sniff and to sneeze.

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